At Home With The Masters Of Horror
by Are We Human
Summary: Following the lives of the villains of all our favourite horror movies as they unite together. But someone is out to kill them all! Will the killer be revealed? Rated 'T' for violence, gore and strong language.
1. Cornflakes & Nancy Thompson

It was a brand new day, and as usual the residents of 'Horror Hall' were having an arguement about cornflakes.

"That was your _third _bowl Myers! I think everyone will agree with me when I say you should slow down," Samara complained, snatching the now empty bowl from Michael Myers' hands.

Freddy smirked. "I guess I would have expected a _woman _to complain about something like this," He commented, pushing his empty bowl away from him.

Samara turned in his direction to glower at him. "For your _info, _Krueger, I was merely thinking about Michael's health! I wouldn't want anything bad happening to him before next halloween!" She said sharply. Then she turned away to gaze lovingly at Michael, "Oh, I do love him so."

"I think he's a little out of _your _league, Sam," Chucky murmered and he and Jason cracked up laughing, "I'm sorry! But it's true."

"Oh really? Atleast Michael loves me! Your Tiffany doesn't love you! You turned her into a _doll _for christ's sake!" Samara yelled, having reached boiling point, "You're so vain, Charles! Why can't you just accept that Michael and I are together now!"

Michael said nothing and looked blank. He only glanced at each of them in turn before grabbing a nearby newspaper and starting to read. Samara stared at him sympathetically for a moment before turning her back on him and clearing away the dishes. Nothing more was said untill everyone had retired from the table to do whatever was on their agenda that day.

Outside Freddy spotted Jason out for a morning stroll. "Hey, Jason, want to go and hunt down merciless teens with me?" He proposed. To his disappointment, Jason shook his head and turned his back on him. Angry, Freddy darted infront of him, "Come on! If we don't kill again soon, everyone on Elm Street will forget that we ever existed!" When Jason gave him a strange look, Freddy sighed, "All right, that _I _ever existed."

"What are you boys doing out there?" Samara called out to them while she was taking out the trash, which consisted of two arms, a leg, and half a brain (The Creeper had devoured the other half the previous day) "Freddy, I hope you're not bullying Jason into slaughtering more teenagers with you!"

"I'm not, Samara!" Freddy protested, "We're just talking! Having a friendly chit-chat!"

Samara didn't believe him for a second. "Oh really? What were you talking about?"

"Uh.." Freddy racked his brains, "We were.. talking about the time we almost slaughtered _eachother, _weren't we Jase?" He said, glancing at Jason for support. Jason shrugged and nodded his head. "See?" Freddy said triumphantly, grinning at Samara.

Rolling her eyes, Samara dumped the trash outside and went back inside. Freddy immidiately turned back to Jason. "So? Are you coming?" He enquired. To his delight, Jason gave in and feebly nodded, then found himself being dragged along by Freddy. Suddenly, a pretty blonde teen came walking slowly down the street.

"This is it, Jase," Freddy hissed to Jason, "Fresh meat. And hey, after we kill her, we'll let The Creeper have the rest of her."

As the teen came their way, Freddy and Jason jumped out at her and screamed things, while the teen folded her arms and raised her eyebrows. "You know, halloween was _last _week guys," She retorted, "So lose the costumes."

"Halloween? Last week?" Freddy murmered, "Oh.. wow, Myers ain't gonna be happy about that."

"Michael Myers? The guy from Halloween? Or are you talking about Mike Myers?" Freddy saw that the teen was talking to him and wasn't sure about how he should react.

"Uh, the guy from Halloween," Freddy murmered, getting aggrivated.

To his horror, the teen suddenly shrieked and jumped up and down, "Oh my god! I love that movie! You have to get me an autograph! Please!" She screamed, practically smothering him. Freddy stared helplessly at Jason, who shrugged, as always and backed away from them.

"Well, if you know him, how come you don't know me?" Freddy said indignantly, the thought suddenly occuring to him.

The girl squinted at him. "Uh? I'm sorry, I don't know you."

Freddy sighed impatiently. "Tall guy with a hat? Has a large claw? Wears a stripy jumper like this?" He said, tugging at his jumper, "Ring any bells?"

"Sorry, no," The teen replied breathlessly, "But Michael Myers! What a _star!"_

Then, to his horror, Freddy suddenly realised who this teen was, "Nancy? Nancy Thompson?" He said, "I - What - I _killed _you! Years ago!" He roared.

Nancy blinked at him. "Nope, I don't think so."

"And what the heck did you do to your hair?" Freddy enquired, his eyes widening as he surveyed her peroxide blonde hairdo, "Jase, you remember her, right? She's the whacko I told you about. You know, the girl who tried to kill me in the first placebutiendedupkillinghermomandherdadandthenloadsofotherpeopleandthenkillingheragaincauseshejustwouldn'tdie?"

Jason said nothing, but nodded as if he understood, which he didn't.

"Yeah, I don't remember you. Sorry. But tell Michael Myers I'd love to chat with him! And also.." She smiled and Freddy was horrified to see a wicked look in her eyes, "..Maybe even get together some time?"

To stop himself from breaking down right then and there, Freddy lashed out at Nancy, sending her head flying. Jason narrowed his eyes at Freddy and then began to clap. Taking a bow, Freddy stepped back, "Teach that stupid bitch to forget me.." He muttered, "Anyway, c'mon Jase."

"Boys! It's time for bed!" Samara called.

"But it's only been five minutes since you were here before?" Freddy called back.

"I think you'll find that you were out there for approximately 82 hours!" Samara called back to him, "Now get in here! Leatherface is reading bed time stories!"

Mumbling to himself, Freddy trudged back over to the house, "I'll kill that Michael Myers, you know that?" He muttered to Jason, who again said nothing, but nodded.

xxxxxx

_So, didja like it? Review :)_


	2. Freddy's Day Out: Part 1

It was a brand new day, and as usual the residents of 'Horror Hall' were lazing around, taking a day off from the stressful job of being psychotic killers.

While Freddy absently flicked through _Murders Digest, _Samara hurried past him, her long black hair in her face while she checked her watch.

Freddy's eyes left his magazine and fell upon her. "Where are you off to?" He enquired.

"Work," Samara muttered, barely noticing he was there.

"I thought you had a day off," Freddy replied, his attention turning back to his reading.

"Yes, well," Samara sighed, "There's a shortage of psychogirlswhocomeoutofwellsandtellpeopletheywilldieinsevendays today, so I offered to step in."

"All right," Freddy mumbled, done talking to her. Samara gave him a severe look of impatience before leaving the room. "I'll be back around three. Remember, you and Jason are asleep by nine. And you have to do whatever Michael says."

"Whatever," Freddy groaned, turning a page.

"I'll check up on you when I get in," Samara warned him, before attempting to brush her hair and failing. With that she left the house, the door shutting behind her. Freddy, who hadn't noticed her go as he had been singing 'Check Up On It' by Beyonce, stopped singing abruptly to find himself face to face with Chucky, who had been smirking at him.

"What do you want?" Freddy asked him, feeling iritated.

"Nothing," Chucky said in a high pitched voice, before laughing and jumping down from Freddy's lap. "Well, I'm going to meet Tiffany. Hey, Freddy.." He glanced around to check that the coast was clear, and then whispered, "..We're trying."

Freddy suddenly jumped up and screamed, "_OH - MY - GOD! THAT IS LIKE SO - !" _

"Knock it off!" Chucky hissed, bonking him on the head, "I don't want people finding out yet."

"Oh," Freddy said in a quiet voice, "Fine. Sam said she wants us back by nine but If she's not coming back 'till three then -" He glanced at Chucky, "You're going to have to stall Myers while I go out for a bit."

Chucky was outraged, "What - ? Well, fine. What are friends for, right?" He offered Freddy a cheesy smile, but did not get one in return. "Yeah well, Tiffany and I might be doin' other things later but - I'll do the best I can."

Freddy narrowed his eyes. "How the hell can you have sex when you're a doll?" He enquired.

"It's complicated, I know, but -"

"Complicated? It's physically impossible!"

Freddy and Chucky spun around. There, standing behind them, was Nancy Thompson. "What - What the hell are you doing here?" Freddy asked, "God, I must be getting old If I can't kill _this _slut!"

Nancy folded her arms. "I've got nine lives, silly! Anyway, I think I may have a plan for how you can get past Myers."

Freddy was intruiged, "Really? Like what?"

"Well, you add some butter, then maybe some olives and tuna.."

Chucky and Freddy exchanged glances. "Uh, weren't you just about to tell him how he could get past Myers?" Chucky said slowly.

Nancy blinked at them. "What? Oh, yes. Yes, I was. Well, that's all fine and dandy, then.." She continued and Freddy and Chucky's eyes widened, "..Well, when I was always trying to get past you, Freddy, I tried to seduce you."

"You never tried to seduce me," Freddy groaned. This girl's cheese had obviously slipped off of her cracker.

"You did! _Freddy! _Oh my god! I'm leaving! This is it for us! Yes, that's right - We're _over!" _Nancy yelled, before turning on her heels and stomping out of the house. When she had gone, Freddy and Chucky said nothing for a while before coughing and launching into a conversation about olives.


	3. Freddy's Day Out: Part 2

So, where were we? Ah, yes.

So anyway, Freddy had managed to slip past Michael Myers and had gone to terrorise the teens of Elm Street. Hoping that he wouldn't bump into that psychopath Nancy Thompson again, Freddy went on tip-toe (which made him look quite stupid) into a random garden and went up to the house. As he turned the door knob, he cried out as the door opened and two brunnette teens appeared.

The teens blinked at him. "Yes?" One of them said slowly, blinking at him.

The air was catching in Freddy's throat as he fought to speak, "I - I was wondering if your mother was home." _What? What the hell was that? _

"No, she's not," The taller teen said, standing infront of the smaller one. She looked quite strong, but obviously not as strong as Freddy himself. He laughed as he thought about how strong he was, untill the teens began to give him weird looks and he fell silent.

"Well, fine. But - I'll talk to you, then," Freddy continued hastily, flashing them a grin, "It's - It's about that blender I lent your mother. Could I possibly have that back?"

The small girl suddenly piped up, "Oh! I'll get it for you, Mr - ?"

"Krueger," Freddy spat, feeling utterly defeated as the girl rushed into the house and then dashed back holding a blender. "So.. you kids ever thought about 'hanging out' with a strange man before? I'm really 'cool' and 'b - blingin'!'" He added, striking a pose. The teenaged girls stared at him for a moment before laughing in his face and slamming the door shut.

"Maybe I just lost my talent years ago after that fight with Jason," Freddy moped, hanging his head as he turned and walked off. The girls hadn't even been afraid of him.. was he really losing it after all? No, that wasn't possibly. Freddy Krueger would show them.

Then, to his horror, he spotted Nancy Thompson heading down the street with a couple of friends. Screaming, Freddy dived into a bush, realised that he shouldn't have screamed and then waited for Nancy to approach him. She did, and Freddy swore he could hear giggling as he stared up at her.

"Hello, Frederick," Nancy said tartly, "Nice day, isn't it?"

"What's with the accent?" Freddy questioned her, raising an eyebrow at the English accent she was putting on.

"I think it suits me, don't you?" Nancy replied, smiling sweetly at him, "Anyway, ta ta, Freddy."

Freddy stared after her as she walked off, and scratched his head. It was then that he noticed Chuck waddling towards him, "Freddy, we have a problem. Myers found out about the whole 'stalling' thing, and now he's - he's -" Chucky was close to tears now, "Well, let's just say - he's not gonna wait untill next halloween!"

"So?" Freddy murmered, folding his arms, "Just do your thing."

Chucky blinked at him. "My.. thing? What?"

"Y'know. Your thing." Freddy said impatiently with a sigh, "That thing where you pretend that you're a doll but you're not, and then while you're pretending to be all cute and innocent you think up some strange and gruesome plan to thwart your enemy?"

Chucky considered this for about a second, "Yeah. That got kind of old, Freddy. The last time I pulled that off was way back in '86."

"You weren't even _alive _in '86!" Freddy exclaimed.

"Sorry, '88. I guess I'm just getting on a little bit, eh?"

Freddy scowled. "Well, he can't kill me anyway. I'm already dead, dumbass." He retorted, laughing in Chucky's face and walking off.

Chucky caught up with him, "Yeah well, I'm dead too!" He replied, "But Myers can still cause damage to the both of us!" There was a look of fear etched in his plastic face, "And - I saw him - p - picking up a box of m - matches!"

Freddy stopped dead. "Are you sure?" He enquired, feeling the world crashing down around his ears.

"Yeah, I'm sure," Chucky insisted with impatience, "So, are you gonna fight him off or what?"

"I can't fight that bastard off, Chucky! We all know that my greatest fear is _fire! _Honestly, have you ever watched _any _of my movies?" Freddy exclaimed, staring at Chucky like he was mad. "Let's just run off to Mexico and start over. Maybe they have an Elm Street over there. It could be Ellemeo Street, or something. What's Elm in Mexican?"

Chucky raised an eyebrow. "Did you ever go to school?" He asked.

"Well - Well, how about you? You're a piece of plastic, for gods sake!" Freddy argued, snarling at him.

Chucky sighed. "Here we go again. I was a human _before _Tiffany resurrected me, remember?"

"Speaking of Tiff, aren't you gonna bring her with us?" Freddy enquired.

"Well, I was joking before. I can't live without my baby!" Chucky said, turning and starting back to the house.

"Where the hell are you going? I thought you were gonna come with me!" Freddy yelled after him, staring after Chucky in disbelief. As Freddy ran after him, the two of them stopped dead, spotting Michael heading towards them clutching a knife and a box of matches.

"Oh my god.." Chucky whispered, "This is it. This is it, Freddy."

"I can't believe it," Freddy hissed, "Look at him. He looks so determined. I'm sorry about everything, Chucky."

"I'm sorry too, dude! I'm also sorry that I borrowed your walkman and then lent it to the Creeper," Chucky replied, giving him a quick hug, a look of suspicion on his face, "Which, I never got back, I might add.." He shrugged, "Maybe he was just hungry."

"Look," Freddy growled, as Michael strode towards them, "I'll see you in hell, I guess."

"Yeah, you too," Chucky mumbled, shrugging his shoulders and waiting anxiously.

When Michael finally came up to them, he cleared his throat, "Frederick," He said, nodding at Freddy, "Charles," He added, nodding at Chucky, "I.."


	4. Freddy's Day Out: Finale

OMG! Suspense! WHAT in the name of the lord is Michael Myers going to do to our heroes? Well, not heroes.. OH JUST READ ON.

**Weirdo Woman: Previously on 'Freddy's Day Out'.**

x

_"Look," Freddy growled, as Michael strode towards them, "I'll see you in hell, I guess."_

_"Yeah, you too," Chucky mumbled, shrugging his shoulders and waiting anxiously._

_When Michael finally came up to them, he cleared his throat, "Frederick," He said, nodding at Freddy, "Charles," He added, nodding at Chucky, "I.."_

x

"I.."

Freddy and Chucky stared at him transfixedly, waiting anxiously for him to finish speaking. However, when Michael did finish speaking, his words to them were: "..Was just about to go out for a bite, and was wondering if you guys wanted to join me."

There was a silence. "You.. want us to grab a bite with you?" Chucky murmered.

"Yes, that is what I said," Michael Myers nodded, "Yes. A bite."

"But, what's with the matches?" Freddy enquired, eyeing the matches in Michael's hand.

Michael stared down at his hand and laughed. "Oh, these? Well, It's a funny story really. I had to use these matches to light some candles and.."

It turned out that Michael's story wasn't funny in the least, and that he had also been holding the knife because he had been about to go out with Jamie Lee Curtis for a 'bite' but it hadn't exactly been a 'bite' if you know what I'm saying. Do you? Good.

"Well, _that _was strange," Chucky said, as he and Freddy stood there looking like idiots, "I really thought he was gonna kill us."

"Yeah, me too," Freddy mumbled, "Ah well, tommorow is another day, and I'm bored. So.. what d'you wanna do now?"

There was an awkward silence. Freddy and Chucky stared at eachother dumbly before Chucky muttered, "Want to uh, go down to Blockbuster and rent 'A Nightmare On Elm Street 4' ?"

Freddy grinned at him. "Sure thing, lil' buddy. And maybe while we're there we'll rent out Seed of Chucky aswell."

"No! Let's rent Childs Play; I hated Bride _and_ Seed!" Chucky protested.

And so, the two 'friends' walked off to Blockbuster together, both feeling a great sense of warmth and contentment.

So.. yeah, sorry this chapter was so short. But, you know.. whatever.


	5. Tiffany's Confession

Boredom. Here we go again, then.

x

On Sunday morning, there was a knock at the door of 1238 Ahousethatyoushouldnotgoto. Mumbling to himself, Jason staggered downstairs to get it. As he opened the door, he found a random neighbour standing there. "Hello, I just came to return the milk carton I borrowed. Well, I actually stole it.. but, here it is anyway."

Jason said nothing and took it, noticing that it was empty. "Oh, I had to use the milk, of course. No hard feelings, though?" The neighbour smiled sweetly and turned away, ducking as Jason lashed out at him with his knife. Scratching his head, Jason then retreated back into the house just as Freddy came down.

"What are you doing?" Jason heard Freddy ask him. He sloped off into the kitchen and placed the empty carton back into the fridge, before walking into the lounge and collapsing on the couch. "Who was that?" Wow, Freddy certainly asked alot of questions. Jason chose not to answer any of them, as always.

Rolling his eyes, Freddy went into the kitchen. "Nice day, huh?" He called to Jason, "Listen, there's some kind of carnival on today. I was hoping you'd join me in some slashing." When Jason said nothing still, Freddy came back. "So? What d'you think?"

"_I _think you guys are up way too early."

Freddy and Jason's heads swivelled round. Then they looked down and noticed Tiffany standing in her tiny robe, smiling sweetly at them. "Oh, it's only Tiffany," Freddy relaxed and then glared at her, "What do you want?"

Tiffany's eyes fell upon Freddy's clenched claw, "Now Freddy, you don't want to get angry," She licked her plastic lips, "Just because this is a holiday doesn't mean I can't make an exception for you."

"You wish you could kill me," Freddy growled, "Now, if you'll excuse me.."

Tiffany shrugged and left them in peace. Scowling, Freddy went back upstairs to clean up. As he stared into the mirror, he jumped and saw someone he never thought he would see again for a very long time. "Oh. Hey, CM."

Candyman grinned at him. "What's up, FK?" He cocked his head to the side, smirking.

"How the hell did you get there?" Freddy enquired, giving Candyman a weird look.

"Oh, well.." Candyman coughed and then continued, "So anyway, how've you been?"

"Hm, can't complain," Freddy shrugged as he began to shave, "The women seem to be dominating the men around here. It sucks."

"Cheer up, Freddy," Candyman sighed, "It could be alot worse. You could be like me," He indicated the hook on his hand, "And trust me, being stuck in a mirror all your life isn't great. Thankfully, Tiffany let me out. So I can stay for lunch."

"You sure can," Freddy said, grinning at him, "Anyway, I have to go. See you later." Candyman nodded at him, and Freddy turned and strolled out of the bathroom, bumping into Tiffany on his way out.

"How about I make up a batch of my special homemade cookies for you, Freddy?" She proposed, smiling sweetly at him. Although she had a face to die for, her blonde hair and sexy eyes were by far her best feature, Freddy knew that he couldn't let himself be drawn in by her.

"Er, no - I have uh, alot to do today!" He said hastily, hurrying past her.

"Freddy, wait!" Tiffany called after him, hurrying after him at a slow pace, "Freddy, wait for me, my love!"

"_What?_" Tiffany spun round and found Chucky standing there. "Since when did you love Freddy? I thought me and you were the real deal, Tiff! And now I find out that you've been screwin' other guys! How the hell d'you think that makes me feel!"

Tiffany rolled her eyes. "I didn't sleep with him, you fucking moron. And I was only joking.. you know I only love you, Chucky," She kissed him and he didn't resist. While the dolls embraced on the landing, Samara came out of her own bedroom after hearing a loud noise coming from downstairs.

"What the hell is all that racket?" Samara yelled, as she came down the stairs to find Freddy and Jason engaged in a fight of some sort, "What the _fuck _is going on here?" Freddy and Jason spun around and hesitated.

"We were just having some fun!" Freddy protested as Samara yanked his arm and pulled his claw off, whilst also robbing Jason of his swords.

"You know how much I hate you boys having your little fights! Now, go and clean yourselves up! You'll get blood allover my new carpet!" Samara scolded them, hands on her hips.

"But -" Freddy began, but Samara wasn't having any of it.

"No buts, Krueger! You too, Voorhees! You heard me!" She said. Realising that they had been defeated by the notorious Samara once again, Freddy and Jason sloped off upstairs. "Tiffany, would you help me in the kitchen? Candyman's staying for lunch."

Tiffany, however, couldn't speak. She looked deathly pale as she came towards Samara. "Sam, I have to tell you something."

"You know you can tell me anything, Tiff! What's on your mind?" Samara replied, listening to her.

"I -" Tiffany began, croaking out the single word, "I think - I think I love Freddy!"

"We were just having a little fun," Freddy complained, as Samara pulled both him and


	6. Nancy's Back! Again!

Let's all watch Citizen Kane

x

"Freddy?"

Freddy Krueger glanced up from the morning paper he had been reading. "Yeah?" He murmered.

"Uh," Chucky scratched his head, "Who do _you _think is more attractive? Charlize Theron or Phoebe Cates?"

There was a moment's silence, then a low chuckle came from Freddy and he slumped lower back into his chair. "Chucky, you ask the most stupid questions, you know that? Obviously Charlize Theron, dumbass. Phoebe Cates is _so _'91."

"Just because she's _older _doesn't mean that she's less attractive," Chucky piped up angrily, glowering at Freddy, "And anyway, _Charlize _wouldn't know how the hell to be attractive if it came up and - slashed her in the throat!"

"Hey, don't say a word about Charlize, okay?" Freddy snarled, "And hey, what are you reading?"

"Playboy," Chucky responded casually, turning the page, "But it's just boring old Pamela Anderson. For once I wish they'd get some pictures of Phoebe in there." When Freddy snorted, Chucky merely ignored him and chucked the magazine to him. "Here. Take it and see if there's anything in there you like."

Freddy said thanks and began to read. Just then, Tiffany came downstairs and froze, gasping a little as she noticed Freddy was in the room. Chucky looked up and saw her, "Hey pookie! Come on over here." He said, beckoning her towards him.

"S - Sure, honey," Tiffany said shakily, moving across the room towards him. When she approached Chucky pulled her up onto his lap and gave her a quick kiss. Tiffany kissed him back, but was watching Freddy intently out of the corner of her eye. "It's your turn to pick Glen up from school, honey."

Chucky looked disgruntled and immidiately pulled away from her, "What? But I picked him up yesterday!"

"Yeah, but I picked him up the _thousand _previous days, didn't I?" Tiffany replied, her lip curled, "Get to it, then."

With a low grumble, Chucky jumped up and left to pick up Glen. A moment after he had gone there was a loud knock at the door, and Freddy went to get it. As he opened the door, his eyes widened. Nancy Thompson was there, carrying a large shovel. Alongside her were the infamous dream warriors, Taryn, Will, Kristen, Kincaid and Joey, also carrying shovels.

"Uh..?" Freddy began, not sure of what to say to them.

"The jig is up, Krueger!" Nancy snarled, glaring at him. Then she stopped and turned to the others, "Now, remember what we talked about. Rules: DON'T look him in the eye. Also, make sure that you breathe VERY quietly. Lastly, hit him as hard as you can. Kristen, you go for the head. The rest of you just keep bashing him."

Freddy laughed, "Oh wow, I really am awaiting this 'bashing' with great anticipation," He said, goggling at them. "Nancy, I thought you were blonde?"

"No, I decided to go back to my natural hair colour," Nancy replied, glancing at him in disdain, "Anyway, you know what they say. Brunnettes do it better!"

"Actually, that's _blondes _do it better," Chucky interjected; he had appeared beside the group with Glen at his side.

"Well, I - I," Nancy cast around for the right words, "I didn't really go to school much! I was always fighting _you!" _She added, pointing a finger accusingly at Freddy, "And anyway, we're now going to beat you both to a pulp! And that little ugly thing aswell!" She said, glancing at Glen, "So, prepare to be - smashed."

"Okay, but before you do that, why not come in for some grub? My wife Tiffany makes the _best _Swedish meatballs," Chucky suggested. The warriors considered, and then grudgingly accepted, stepping forward into the house. "So, what's this all about?" Chucky said with a sigh as they all sat down.

"_He _killed my friends!" Nancy exclaimed, pointing at Freddy.

"Well, _she _laid _my _spirit to rest and beat me at our killing game again!" Freddy shot back at her, close to tears.

"Now, now," Chucky interrupted, "You guys! You're so stupid, fighting for such stupid reasons! So what if Freddy killed Nancy's friends, that was a long time ago! And so what if Nancy killed you again Freddy, you managed to kill her three times, remember?"

Freddy managed a smile and nodded.

"Yeah. So, why don't you guys just kiss and make up? You've both learned your lesson now, I hope," Chucky went on, "C'mon. Just make up and get over it."

Freddy and Nancy hugged and apologised for their foul behaviour. Then, when Chucky had gone off to play darts with Jason and Candyman, Tiffany entered the room with a hot bowl of Swedish meatballs in her grasp. "Here you go, kids, woman and demon. Eat up."

"Thanks Tiff," Freddy said, starting to eat. "You want me to give you a hand in the kitchen?"

"Oh! Oh.. no, Freddy. I'm fine, honestly," Tiffany said quickly, running out of the room. A moment later, Samara returned from work to find, to her amazement, Freddy and Nancy getting along like a house on fire.

"Wow.. what the hell happened here?" She said in a strange voice, "Freddy? I thought you hated this girl."

"No, I really like her," Freddy told her with a grin, "And I think she likes me, too."

"I sure do, Freddums!" Nancy said, "And I don't care about what society says about our relationship, because I love you."

"I love you too, Nance."

While Chucky and Jason began to play darts using the dream warriors' (minus Nancy) heads as dart boards, Tiffany gazed at Freddy and Nancy from inside the kitchen, and wondered if this was a nightmare.


	7. Confrontation

Blah I've been gone but now I'm back and here is a new chapter for you lovely people.

x

It was Saturday night, so of course Freddy, Chucky and Michael were sitting watching Saturday Night Live. The girls, AKA Samara, Nancy and Tiffany, had gone out clubbing and had left the men alone. Freddy sighed while Chucky slumped back in his chair. "You know what you guys? I don't think we kill enough anymore." Freddy said finally, glancing at them both with a serious look on his face.

"What? Of course we still kill alot you dumb fuck! Hey, remember the time - ?" Chucky broke off, trying to remember, then stopped. "Yeah, you're right. This blows! We haven't killed anyone in like - a month or somethin'! We _have _to get outta here and make some fresh kills before we go beserk!"

"Sounds like a plan," Freddy mused, then swivelled round in his seat to face Michael, "What about you, Mike?"

Michael said nothing because he couldn't talk, but nodded vigourously. "Then let's go!" Chucky said quickly, jumping up and turning off the TV. Freddy and Michael nodded and followed him out of the house, all three of them looking around for the women who didn't seem to be coming home. "Damn it's late. I'd appreciate it more if Tiff was here to help me out.." Chucky sighed in the cold night air.

"You mean you need a _woman _to help kill somebody?" Freddy said incredulously, glancing at him wide-eyed, "Just relax. We'll find somebody and we'll gut them like they've never been gutted before. Okay?"

Chucky smiled and felt reassured, "Yeah. Okay."

They walked out of the house and the girls were standing there. Freddy stared. Chucky stared. Michael stared.. at Nancy's breasts. He had never seen breasts before as Samara's hair was always covering them.

"Mike, quit gaping at my girlfriend's breasts!" Freddy exclaimed, lashing out at Michael with his claw. Michael ducked and whimpered. Tiffany was just like.. woah. So was everybody. It was weird because Michael was supposed to be a cold blooded killer and he was afraid of a claw. Shocking.

"What are you guys doing out here?" Tiffany enquired, frowning, "Charles Lee Ray! You get your fat ass back inside that house _right now!" _

"I'm goin, I'm goin!" Chucky mumbled, turning and walking back into the house.

"My boyfriend was called _Glen,_" Nancy said dreamily, staring into space.

"Uh, yeah. Right. I killed him like - years ago, Nancy. Jesus, stop livin' in the eighties will ya?" Freddy bonked her on the head and Nancy looked at him, the most shocked she'd ever been since, like, ever!

"How dare you abuse a woman," She said coldly, walking away from him.

"Hey, Nancy, wait a second!" Freddy went after her and then froze on the spot. Nancy had seen it too, she looked up and there he was, the Creeper himself, swooping down and closing in on his prey..

_WILL NANCY BE OK? DOES ANYONE EVEN REALLY CARE IF SHE'S OK OR NOT? _


	8. Bon Voyage, Chucky

WOOP! AHWTMOH is BACK! Will Nancy and Freddy get it on? Will Nancy DIE horrifically at the Creeper's clutches? Will Tiffany hatch her plan to eliminate Nancy once and for all? Will Michael Myers say ANYTHING? FIND OUT IN THIS SPIFFY NEW CHAPTER!

x

-Rewind-

_"Uh, yeah. Right. I killed him like - years ago, Nancy. Jesus, stop livin' in the eighties will ya?" Freddy bonked her on the head and Nancy looked at him, the most shocked she'd ever been since, like, ever!_

_"How dare you abuse a woman," She said coldly, walking away from him._

_"Hey, Nancy, wait a second!" Freddy went after her and then froze on the spot. Nancy had seen it too, she looked up and there he was, the Creeper himself, swooping down and closing in on his prey.._

OMG! I bet you were falling off the edge of your seat waiting to know what happened next.. well probably not but okay.

x

Nancy was scared for her life. She just stood there, struck dumb by the thing that was swooping down towards her. Soon she would be.. Creeper food, and that wasn't what she wanted at all! But she couldn't move, her legs were stuck to the ground!

But at the very last second, literally; Tiffany cried out and jumped forwards, pushing Nancy out of the way. The Creeper landed on his head and Nancy was shocked. So was everybody! Michael Myers' jaw was practically down to the ground!

Nancy sat up. "You saved me." She said simply.

Tiffany raised an eyebrow. "Uhh, yeah." She muttered.

"Oh my god Tiffany! You're such a good friend! I love you!" Nancy cried, hugging Tiffany close and weeping hysterically. Tiffany was freaked out (well, who wouldn't be?) but she hugged Nancy back all the same.

"Tiffany, you saved my girl," Freddy said from behind them. Tiffany turned around to face him and nodded.

"Yeah, I guess I did, huh?" She said sweetly, fluttering her eyelashes.

Freddy came to her. "Tiffany, I've been thinking, and I think we should -"

"YAAARRGHHH!"

Everyone looked around. OMG! IT WAS GHOSTFACE! Chucky was lying flat on his plastic back. He was being stabbed in the stomach by the one and only Ghostface. "Why didn't we notice that before?" Samara said, scratching her head and then coming to her senses, "Oh my god! Chucky!"

But Chucky was already as good as dead - again. Ghostface raised his knife one last time and slashed Chucky's throat, ripping out an arterie. Blood was everywhere, allover the grass, and as Samara wept about this, everyone stared in shock as Ghostface stood up, bowed and then ran away.

Silence.

Shock.

Complete and utter SHOCK.

Tiffany then realised that she was Chucky's wife and started fake crying because maybe if she did that she'd get Freddy's attention and he'd finish his sentence. "OH MY GOD! CHUCKY! MY LOVE! SPEAK TO ME!" She screamed, tearing at her hair.

She glanced over at Freddy expectantly but he just gave her a weird look and then went to look at Chucky with the others.

"Is he really - _dead?_" Nancy asked in a choked up voice.

"As good as," Samara mumbled, "Hey, check out that Ghostface. He's trying to climb up our roof!"

Sure enough, Ghostface was climbing up the roof. When he saw that everyone was looking at him he slipped on the tiles and fell forwards, falling from the roof onto the grass, where he laid sprawled out and motionless for ten seconds before jumping up and running along down the street.

"I guess we've got a - a funeral to plan," Tiffany said, sniffling, "Freddy, what were you going to say?"

Freddy looked at her, "Oh! Tiffany, I've been thinking, and I think we should.."

Tiffany waited.

"..All go to burger king."

x

Crap i know, i mean who would READ this crap.. but so what. I have fun.


	9. Noah's Verdict

Dr. Noah Wyle came out of the room, closing the door slowly behind him. He had a weird expression on his face, and the others guessed that things weren't looking good. "So.. how is he?" Samara croaked, breaking the billowing silence.

"Well Miss Morgan, please allow me to be Frank -"

"Ookay, we didn't ask for your life story doctor," Freddy snapped, "Just tell us how he is!"

Dr. Noah Wyle felt like slapping Freddy but kept calm. "Well, he's under sedation right now. If we hadn't have given him the drugs I'm sure he would have made mincemeat out of us all by now." He sighed, "So, how did this happen again?" He added hastily.

"Umm.."

Everyone suddenly looked really uncomfortable. They all glanced at Nancy and shrugged. "Um, he was flying towards me when he.. had his accident. Freddy and I were.. having an arguement and he just swooped in on me and then -" She smiled at Tiffany, "- Tiffany saved me."

Tiffany shrugged and rolled her eyes, frowning.

Dr.Noah Wyle turned to Tiffany. "So, I understand that this is hard for you at the moment, Mrs Ray. But uh -" He drew breath, "- Could I possibly come to the funeral?"

Tiffany sighed at him. "Of course, Mister Wyle. You may come to the funeral." She replied.

Dr. Noah nodded, "Of course. Well, you should all get some rest now. I'm sure it's been a very long day for you," He started to turn away but stopped, "Oh! And the Creeper is currently suffering from very bad amnesia 'sp?' but we should have that sorted out soon."

Samara burst into tears. Nobody could really make out what she was saying, but Freddy thought he heard her sobbing something about: "So young, so valiant.." before they all got up to leave the ER. He looked round at Tiffany, who seemed to be handling Chucky's unfortunate death really well. Glen had been in touch and was on his way over.

"Well, let's go home," Samara sniffed as Michael put his arm around her, "Tiff, I'm sorry about Chucky." She paused, "I know how much you _loved _him," And there was a severe look in her eyes. Tiffany suddenly remembered that she'd told Samara that she was in love with Freddy. Omg..

So the whole gang trooped out of the hospital and went home. Everyone was really down about what had happened. Samara tried to heighten their spirits by baking french cookies, but nobody was really that hungry. Jason and Candyman played chess for awhile but found that they didn't really have the energy. Michael sat alone in the corner facing the wall, while Freddy sat in his favourite armchair not saying a word. Nancy had tried to console with him but found that it was no use, so she was talking to Samara instead. Tiffany sat alone also, but her eyes were fixed on Freddy.

"Listen guys, we have to do _something,_" Samara said after a long while, "There's funeral preperations to be made here!"

"Yeah, but Tiff's in charge of that, right?" Candyman mumbled, then yelled, "_Checkmate!" _In Jason's face.

"Samara's right, guys, we have to be strong," Nancy agreed, clasping her hands together, "Especially for Tiffany's sake."

"Forget _my _sake," Tiffany mumbled, then she had an idea. "Oh, Chucky's gone, whatever will I do?" She began to sob, hoping that Freddy would look over and feel sorry for her, but he didn't. Well, who could blame him? His best friend had just been murdered by some Ghostyman. Wouldn't YOU be upset? Hm?

Well anyway, Tiffany gave up but soon found Samara and Nancy hugging her. "If there's anything you need, we'll be here for you," Nancy was saying, almost in tears herself.

"Yeah, it's okay Tiff, we're gonna be right by your side," Samara said, her voice breaking.

Tiffany sat up, deep in thought. "But who _was _that Ghostface?" She wondered aloud.

Nancy and Samara sat up, exchanging worried glances with eachother. "Well.. did Chucky have any enemies? You know, people who hated and despised him?" Samara enquired.

"Yeah, loads of them," Tiffany mumbled, rolling her eyes.

"Well, let's look at the suspects! There's Glen, the _obvious _son," Candyman piped up suddenly, "And what about those teens you almost killed in _Bride of Chucky? _You know, they might have wanted revenge! _Oh wait, I've got it!" _He paused and nodded, "_Jennifer Tilly."_

"Oh, please!" Nancy exclaimed, folding her arms, "Why would _GLEN _murder Chucky? And I'm not even going to dignify the Jennifer Tilly theory with an answer!"

"Oh come on, Glen's _always _had a.. strange relationship with his father," Candyman said, "Maybe he just got sick of never being the centre of attention in Seed of Chucky?"

"Oh, yeah, right," Nancy snorted.

"Well, what about _you? You're _not exactly a heroess or whatever! Your performance in A Nightmare On Elm Street 1 was so bad that I almost threw up!" Candyman retorted back at her.

"_Oh yeah? _Well Candyman 3 wasn't exactly a picnic for me _either!" _Nancy yelled at him, "And that _hook? _Can you say _Peter Pan rip-off?"_

Nancy and Candyman began to quarrel but Samara broke it up, "All right already!" She glared in both of their directions, "Okay. I'm tired of this. Let's just go to bed and figure this out in the morning. And CM?" She looked at Candyman and sighed, "It _was _kind of a Peter Pan rip off you had going there."

By the time everyone had retired to their rooms it was way past midnight. Little did they all know, though, was that _Ghostyface _was awake and right outside one of their bedroom windows! Which one, though?


	10. Bye Bye Michael Baby

As Freddy and Nancy climbed into bed, Nancy tried yet again to make him talk to her. "Fred? Please, honey! You know I can't _stand _the silent treatment!" She wailed, grabbing his arm and shaking him vigourously.

"All right, you bitch!" Freddy growled, glaring at her, "I'm just a little upset is all."

"Aww, I know Freddums, but don't you think you should just let it go? I mean, just let it go.." Nancy murmered.

Freddy sat up. "Chucky only died tonight, Nance." He explained.

"He did? Oh, I need to take my pills then.." Nancy sighed, "I tells ya, even though I dyed my hair back to it's original brown colour I still seem to have a trace of blonde roots!" She then glanced forwards, "No offense intended towards blondes, by the way."

"Will you be quiet? I'm trying to sleep," Freddy grumbled, turning over on his side away from her. Nancy huffed and lay down to sleep, switching off the light as she did so.

Meanwhile, Michael and Samara were both sleeping soundly. Suddenly, there was a noise from outside. Michael's eyes flew open but his mask was covering his face so nobody could see his eyes not that anyone was looking at him right then..

Anyway, Michael looked around the room for a moment before going back to sleep. Moments later, however, there was another noise, like something had bounced off the window. Something _had _bounced off the window. Michael went to investigate. There was a dent in the window.

Michael went back to bed but heard the noise again, and so started shaking Samara violently. "What? Michael, what is?" Samara said groggily, glancing blearily at him. She didn't even wait for him to explain it to her, she just turned over and fell silent.

Michael decided to check it out. He grabbed his large knife out of his drawer, put on his clothes and gloves and ran a finger gently over the gleaming knife. Not a trace of blood. Well yeah, Michael hadn't killed for a while. He supposed he had just decided to cut down a bit.

After doing his hair, Michael crept out of his and Samara's bedroom and went downstairs, careful not to wake anyone. Suddenly, he heard his name being called from the darkness. "_Michael,_" The voice hissed at him in harsh tones. Michael was suddenly quite afraid for the first time in his life, and went outside to see if anyone was out there.

His eyes widened at the sight that met his eyes as he stepped out onto the front porch. There was someone there, someone with exceedingly long arms. They wore a dirty brown hat, a red and grean sweater..

That same voice cackled at Michael. He looked round and to his horror there was the sound of the scraping of fingernails against something. "_You'd better run, Michael, 'cause one, two - Freddy's comin' for you!"_

Michael didn't need telling twice. He turned and ran down the street, knowing that Freddy was catching up with him. He hadn't even seen his face, but he didn't need to. Michael knew that it was Freddy. And then it explained why he hadn't said anything that evening. God, Freddy was going to kill him and gut him right here in the street..

Michael decided to fight. He turned and saw that Freddy had caught up with him. The figured, assuming that it was Freddy, stopped dead. "Well, Michael. Here we are," The figure was grinning but Michael couldn't see. "So.. should I tell you why I'm going to gut you right here in the street before I do so?"

Michael nodded.

"Well.." The figure (freddy) snickered in the shadows. "You've always been stealing my thunder, Michael. Elm Street was a great movie! Halloween had been sucessful also, but no - you just couldn't let me enjoy the fame, could ya?" Freddy laughed again, "So the sequels just kept comin'. Well, I obviously couldn't let that happen and had to make more. But it _hurt, _Michael, literally! That's how I hurt my back in '89!"

Michael was speechless. He stood rooted to the spot as Freddy explained all this to him, and understood. Jealousy. Pure and simple. Well, Michael definitely wasn't going to give up his place as one of the great masters of horror that easily. He took the knife from his pocket and waited untill Freddy was done talking. Then..

Too late. Way too late. Freddy had obviously watched Michael take the knife from his pocket because at that moment he threw himself forwards ontop of Michael and began slashing his chest. Michael tried to break free but Freddy had him pinned down.

The end for Michael Myers came very quickly. First, Freddy ripped his heart out. Then, he cutout the rest Michael's insides and simply let them spill across the ground. He didn't quite cut off his head, but Freddy sure as hell made Michael look.. well, i can't think of a word for it.

Michael's eyes were black and lifeless. He was dead. But in those few short moments before he died he could have sworn that the face of his attacker wasn't Freddy's. They wore a mask. A kind of Ghost mask.


	11. Falsely Accused?

They had found his body the very next morning. Well, it wasn't that hard to miss, was it? Everyone was pretty much devastated, especially Samara, who bawled like a baby for most of the morning going on about how she and Michael were some sort of _couple.._like please girl, give it a rest.

They were all sitting at the kitchen table. Nobody felt like eating anything, and besides, Samara was their cook and she didn't look or feel up to making anything. Silence.. nobody was talking. It's because they were devastated, about Michael, you know?

"We need to talk about this," Nancy said firmly, standing up, hands on her hips.

Samara glared at her. "No, we don't."

"Yes we fucking _do!" _Nancy exclaimed, "Samara, you fucking think what happened to Michael was an _accident? _It was murder, Sam, fucking murder!"

"Well you'd better stop fucking swearing then," Freddy grumbled, and Nancy shot him a look that told him to stop talking.

"I'm just _saying _that what happened to Michael was no accident, don't you guys agree with me?" She looked round at them all in despair but they didn't look back at her. Samara did, she was glaring at Nancy, almost hating her. Why couldn't she just let it alone? Why did she have to bring all this shit up?

"I kind of agree," Candyman said lowly, "You guys, Michael was gutted. No way did he do that to himself."

"Yes! Exactly!" Nancy said gratefully, almost breathlessly.

Tiffany looked rather distant. "It's just like what happened to Chucky.." She sighed, "I'm sorry Sam, but I agree with Nancy. Michael was murdered, and you know it."

"So _what _if I do? You think I want to hear this right now?" There were tears in Samara's eyes as she spoke, "I don't _want _to talk about this right now you guys. I just want to grieve and mourn, and then maybe make myself a latte. Is that _too much _to ask?"

She stared at them all and they didn't speak. Samara nodded, "Okay then. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go to work."

She made to get up but Nancy grabbed her arm, "Sam, you shouldn't be going into work today." She said, staring at her sympathetically.

"Yeah, you look positively fucked up," Freddy said whilst playing with a deck of cards, and Nancy wanted to slap him.

"Wait a second, you guys don't think that this could be the work of a serial killer do you?" Candyman interrupted.

Everyone goggled at him. "What? Are you serious?" Samara exclaimed, "No, no. I bet it was just some demented crazy guy from some institution.." She sighed, "No, you guys. Michael wasn't murdered. The sooner you realise that the better." She got up and left the room. Everyone stared after her as she left.

"God, you guys, what the fuck - ?" Freddy slammed his fist down on the table in anger. Nancy put her arms around him.

"I think he was murdered," Tiffany said absently, glancing at the two of them, "C'mon guys, we have to do something. What if it's one of us next? They already got Chucky and Michael, so whose gonna be _next?"_

Freddy stared at Nancy. Nancy stared at Jason. Jason stared at Candyman. Candyman stared out of the window.

"I think it could be Samara," He said, "So maybe we should all stick together so this crazy killer doesn't make mincemeat out of another one of us huh?"

"Woah, you're accusing Samara or saying she's next?" Freddy shot back at him, wearing a scowl.

"I'm not saying either," Candyman replied angrily, "I mean, it could be her for all we know!"

"Wait a second, we were all standing there and we all watched Chucky get killed! And I saw Samara standing next to me and I saw the rest of you guys aswell," Nancy interjected suddenly, a thoughtful look etched on her face, "So then.. how could it be one of us?"

They all pondered this. "I know who it is," Freddy growled, "I fuckin' know who it is."

"Who is it?" Nancy asked him.

"It's fuckin' Glen! It's that bastard!" Freddy exclaimed, "I should have known, you know? He's always been against Chucky. Ever since Seed.." There were tears in his eyes, "I'm gonna hunt down that bastard and fuckin' kill him. Who the fuck does he think he is?"

"Calm down honey, you don't know it's him," Nancy said calmly, trying to console with him.

Freddy shook her off impatiently, "Hey, I know I'm right, okay? Don't you guys believe me?" There was a knock at the door. Nancy gave Freddy's shoulder a quick squeeze before hurrying off to get it. She returned looking rather pale. Alongside her were Samara, Hannibal Lecter and Deputy Dewey Riley.

"Dr. Lecter told me he saw something last night," Samara said coldly, and she glared at them all, "He saw someone with Michael, last night."

"What?" All of them cried, listening intently now.

"He says he saw someone wearing a dirty brown hat, a red and green sweater.." Samara was pale and she looked at Freddy, whose eyes were extremely wide now, "He says the person had extremely long arms and a metal claw thing."

Everyone looked at Freddy. Freddy looked at Nancy. There was something burning in her eyes and Freddy knew at once that it wasn't love. But he hadn't killed Michael.. he would never do that..

"Frederick Charles Krueger, I am arresting you on suspicion of murder," Deputy Dewey said lowly.


	12. Hello, Samara

_I watched as they carried him off to the ambulance on a stretcher. Well yeah, he'd put up a pretty decent fight so they'd have to sedate him. How ironic.. 'I Wanna Be Sedated' was playing on the radio at that exact moment. Oh well. _

_I can't believe he would do something like this. I don't believe it, actually. I know how close he and Chucky were, and he never really seemed to have a problem with Myers. It's either Lecter coming out with shit or.. _

_Would he do something like this?_

_No, I won't believe it. Not for a second. I love him, and I know him. And he wouldn't do this._

_But if he didn't do it, then who did?_

_Hmm.._

_**Nancy? **No, she didn't know Chucky and Myers much any how. And she seems pretty genuine from what I've seen of her. _

_**Candyman? **Hell no, he wouldn't. He's one loyal bastard._

_**Jason? **Well, he is crazy. But I think he'd snap and find some way to tell us that he'd done it. He wouldn't hide it away._

_**Samara? **No way, she loved Myers. And she was pretty fond of Chucky aswell._

_**Glen? **It's a possibility.. I mean, where the heck is that kid? I haven't seen him in days! But I know him so well, and I love him and Chucky loved him. He wouldn't murder his own father._

_Well, that just leaves.._

x

Samara sat with her head in her hands while Candyman and Jason tried to explain to her why Freddy wasn't the killer. "There was enough evidence for Freddy to go to jail for life," Nancy said sharply, hugging Samara from behind, "Come on, Sam. He's gone now, you have to be strong."

"Everyone will suffer.." Samara said hoarsley, "..If that son of a bitch doesn't go behind bars."

"And he will," Nancy said through gritted teeth, "Hopefully, anyway."

"How can you say that? I thought you guys were really working out!" Candyman argued with her, "This is just a real stab in the back, Nance."

"Well, when you find out that your boyfriend is a mass murderer you kind of feel that you're done with him," Nancy said sarcastically, slapping him on the head as she passed by, "And anyway, I kind of got the feeling that he never really loved me. He was always so.. arrogant," She concluded whilst getting a carton of milk from the fridge.

"How can you even be _sure _that it's Freddy?" Candyman went on, ignoring this, "I mean, if they don't find his finger prints then how will they beable to acuse him?"

"He could have worn _gloves _honey," Nancy said fiercely, "You know what? I don't want to talk about this anymore. We're here for Sam now, okay?"

Candyman and Jason flopped back in their seats. "Yeah, whatever.."

Tiffany sighed. "Isn't it strange though? I mean, first Chucky, _my _guy.. then Michael, _Sam's _guy.. and Freddy, _Nancy's _guy, is supposed to have murdered Michael?"

"He _did _murder Michael," Samara hissed coldly, glaring at her, "I know he did."

"I don't think Freddy did it, Sam," Tiffany said, "It just seems like a pattern, that's all.." She looked at Nancy, "Don't you agree with me, Nancy?"

Nancy shrugged and looked uncomfortable. "I don't know.. I always thought that Freddy went soft when we first got together. But inside he is still a cold blooded killer.." She sighed, "I always thought he would change."

"Bullshit! Freddy's changed," Tiffany snapped, "Sam, Nancy, you don't believe me? Fine. But I believe that Freddy had nothing to do with Michael's death." She stood up and left the room. Candyman and Jason stared after her in awe.

"I agree with her," Candyman said.

"Yeah? Well nobody gives a shit about what you think," Samara said, throwing the cookie jar at him before storming off.

x

Later that night, Samara was dozing in the living room when the phone began to ring. She stirred, then jolted awake. Samara picked up the phone, "Hello?" She said, yawning.

"_Hello Samara," _A creepy voice came from down the line, "_Or 'Sam'. What's your favourite scary movie?"_

"Duh! _Ringu. _The Ring was always so overrated," Samara rolled her eyes, "Who is this, anyway? I'm really tired."

"_You tell me."_

Samara sat up straight. "Um, no. Maybe _you _tell me, and I either hang up or scream down the phone at you for being a jerk." She snapped.

"_Where am I, Sam?"_

Samara looked around, then wondered why she was looking around. "What?" She said absently into the phone.

G

"_I can see you, Sam." _The creepy voice replied, and cackled.

Suddenly Samara was afraid. She was never afraid, but she suddenly felt a chill down her bony spine. Why was she scared? There was nothing to be afraid of, this was just some guy being a complete ass.

_"Let's play a game, Sam."_

Samara caught her breath and came to her senses. "What game?" She replied.

"_Well, I ask a question, and if you get it right, you live."_

"What? I li -" Samara didn't finish her sentence. She suddenly knew who this was. It had to be the same crazy psycho who had murdered Michael. But where were they? Somewhere in the house? Samara knew she was alone besides this guy. Nancy and Tiffany had gone out and Candyman and Jason had also vanished.

_"Who was the bad guy in 'Phantasm'?" _The crazy psycho guy asked, arousing Samara from her thoughts.

"Um.." Samara had seen this one. She knew the answer, but couldn't quite put her finger on it, "Um, um.."

_"Time's running out, Sam."_

Samara suddenly knew, "Tall Man! It's Tall Man!" She cried, "There, you bad ass. Now leave me alone."

_"Oh, wrong answer, Sam."_

Before Samara could object, however, there was a noise from behind her, and the closet door burst open, revealing a weird looking guy wearing some kind of halloween costume. Samara couldn't see his face, it was covered by a ghost mask of some sort.

"Ghostface?" She said, stunned.

"_Exactly," _Ghostface cackled, and raised a huge butcher knife, "_Want to play another game, Samara?"_

"Not really, I'm not in the mood," Samara said absently, chewing her hair.

"_You're not really in a place where you can negotiate that, Sam," _Ghostface said darkly, "_Now let's play. If you don't, you die."_

Samara's eyes widened as Ghostface came towards her with the knife.


	13. The End For?

Samara screamed, diving out of the way as Ghostface lurched forwards with the knife. "_Come on, Sam, I only want to play a little game," _He said in that menacing tone of voice. He went after Samara, who had tried hiding behind the curtains. _"I can see that you're not going to play fair. Well, then you'll have to be punished.."_

Ghostface lashed out at the curtains with the knife. Samara squealed and got out from behind them before Ghosty could get her. "So, you killed Chucky and Michael?" She cried out, throwing a nearby lamp at him which smashed on his head.

"_Ah jeez.. ouch, um, yeah, I did," _Ghostface replied, rubbing his head, _"I knew I shouldn't have done this with a hangover.." _He mumbled, before getting back to the task at hand and going right after Samara again.

"Well, I have to say - I think you're very talented!" Samara cried, backing away from him as he moved towards her, "In the killing field, that is."

Ghostface shrugged. _"Well, it took a lot of practice.. I had to kill quite a lot of brainless teenagers before I could move on to the majors. Killing Michael Myers and Chucky is gonna work wonders for my career."_

"Well, I thought you were great in _Scream,_" Samara remarked, "You always seemed sort of.. sexy." She winked at him.

"_Really, eh? Yeah, I guess I am.." _He shrugged again but then raised the knife, _"I'm so sorry that I have to cut you up into little pieces aswell, of course. You seem like a pretty nice girl." _

"Well uh, maybe we could -" But Ghostface had lurched forwards before Samara could finish her sentence. "Wait a fucking minute!" She screamed, and Ghostface stopped abruptly. "I was going to _say, _before you did that, that we could discuss this like the civilized adults that we are over dinner!"

Ghosty considered it. _"I guess it would be good to get outta the house once and a while. You know, sometimes it's hard being a psycho killer." _He sniffed, _"Nobody loves you. Nobody cares about you.."_

"Aww honey, I care about you!" Samara said, getting tearful herself as she moved towards him, "You know what? I think you've got a big heart. And for you to actually have the decency to - to -" She sniffed, her voice breaking as she spoke, "Oh god, come here, honey!"

Samara and Ghostface hugged eachother tightly, and cheesy romantic music began to play in the background. Then suddenly, out of nowhere, Ghostface raised the butcher knife and stabbed Samara right in the back.

She looked surprised, and in pain. Ghostface liked to see people in pain. It was refreshing.

Samara staggered backwards, choking on the blood in her mouth, and then collapsed in a heap on the floor. In her last moments, Samara wondered who this guy was, and had realised long ago when he first sprung out from the closet that it wasn't Freddy. So who was it? She would never know. She was dying. She was dead.

_"Yeah right, bitch,"_ Ghostface laughed and spat on her, _"Like I'd go out with some hoe like you?" _

He left the room, careful to walk over Samara's sprawled out body as he did so.

x

The very next day, Tiffany went to visit Freddy in prison. "I thought you would have busted out of here already," She said quietly as they sat in his cell together.

Freddy sighed. "Yeah, me too. I've been thinking things over though, you know?" He looked awful. Tiffany guessed it was the food they served inmates there, but whatever.. "I've been thinkin' about Nancy, and about Chucky and Michael. It's really hard to go on when I know that everybody hates me now."

"Nobody hates you Freddy," Tiffany said softly, reaching out and placing her plastic hand in his, "And I kind of have some bad news. Samara died last night. She was.. murdered." Tears burned in Tiffany's eyes as she spoke. "It's the killer. He came back."

"No shit," Freddy mused, "Well, that'll teach that bitch to accuse _me _of murder."

Tiffany stared at him, outraged.

"_So sorry _about Sam by the way," Freddy went on hastily, looking away from her, "So what's gonna happen now? Am I allowed to get outta here yet?"

"I don't know, I'll have to see about that," Tiffany bit her lip anxiously and looked at him. He looked terrible, she doubted he'd eaten for days. "Come on, Freddy. Stay strong. It's what Chucky would have wanted, isn't it?"

"Whatever," Freddy grumbled, "I just wanna get outta this shithole soon. But Tiff -" He sat up straight and looked into her eyes, "Thanks for comin' down here today. It's really great that you still trust me a little. And I didn't kill Chucky or Michael," He concluded firmly, a severe look in his eyes, "I swear."

"I believe you," Tiffany said faintly, lost in his eyes, "Anyway, I have to go now. I'll see you later, and I'll see if you're allowed out of here on bail or somethin'."

Freddy smiled at her. "Thanks, Nance - I mean, Tiff," He sighed and Tiffany looked at him quizzically, "I miss her so much. Tell her that I didn't do it and try to make her believe it, okay?"

"I will," Tiffany said, "Bye, Freddy."

"Bye, Tiff."

x

The Creeper was back, Tiffany saw, as she arrived back home. He was sitting with Nancy on the front porch. "Now honey, you just have to remember what the doctor told you: _no swooping in on people unexpectedly and trying to eat their brains._" Nancy was saying to him, very slowly so he would understand.

The Creeper nodded vigourously and then tried to take a bite out of Nancy's shoulder. "Ah, ah!" She said sharply, slapping one of his grimy hands away. She saw Tiffany and waved, "Oh, hey Tiffany! Look whose back!" She jerked her thumb at the Creeper, "And cured, aswell. But he's a little dumb now. He can't fly for a while."

"Oh, really?" Tiffany said pensively, not giving a shit, "Nancy, I really need to talk to you about Freddy."

Nancy's face suddenly went pale. "Forget it, I'm not listening!" She jammed her fingers in her ears and began to sing loudly.

"Nancy, It's really important!" Tiffany insisted, grabbing her arm, "You don't even know it's him and you're making assumptions. Besides, it was dark. How do you know that someone was disguised as Freddy and Lecter just automatically assumed that it was him?"

"I highly doubt that's true, Tiffany," Nancy said sharply, wrenching her arm free of Tiffany's grip, "So, if you'll excuse me.."

"No!" Tiffany was surprised at herself. She let go of Nancy's arm after grabbing hold of it again. "Listen Nancy, what about you and Freddy? What about your life together? I thought you were looking forward to being his wife -"

"Not anymore!" Nancy said dramatically, then smiled for some reason. "Wow. I should _really _start making movies again." She mused, then shrugged and went to walk back into the house, but Tiffany wouldn't let her go that easily.

"Nancy, it's just me, you, Freddy, Candyman, Jason and -" She sighed, "- _That _dude," Indicating the Creeper. "Look, I'm not asking you to forgive him. I'm just asking you to go down to the prison to see him," She smiled, her plastic face lighting up, "He's been on about you all the time since he's been in there. He misses you."

Nancy sighed, "All right," She said resignedly, bending down and placing a hand on Tiffany's shoulder, "Thanks so much for this, Tiff. I know I can always count on you to bring me hope," Tiffany laughed and Nancy smiled, "Okay. So, I'm just gonna go down there for a while. I'll see what he has to say." She gave Tiffany a serious look before departing. Tiffany stared sadly after her, hoping against hope that maybe, _possibly - _Freddy would start talking bullshit to her so Nancy would get all upset and then break up with him.

Oh, yeah. _That _would be sweet.

Tiffany stopped thinking about that once the Creeper tried to take a bite out of her neck but ended up with several broken teeth.


	14. Uh Oh, Nancy!

NEXT CHAPTER..

enjoy.

---

"_Nancy!"_

Freddy was delighted to see her. Nancy stiffened and folded her arms, walking into his cell and sitting down opposite him. "Well, come on. Say what you have to say, and it better be worth it." Nancy said sharply, "Tiffany told me to come. She said you missed me."

"Of course I do!" Freddy exclaimed, "Nance, you gotta' get me outta' here. Samara's dead and you _know _I didn't do it!" He looked at her, feeling exasperated. Nancy sighed and raised a hand to her forehead.

"How do I know you didn't kill her? You could have visited her in her dreams.." Nancy bit her lip, "Freddy, I want you to be straight with me. Did you kill Chucky, Michael or Samara?"

"No! I didn't!" Freddy said at once, "I loved those guys, Nancy. Just like I love you."

Nancy's eyes narrowed. "Really?"

"Yeah! And when I said, just like I love you, I meant like.." Freddy trailed off for a moment and then continued, "..Like, I mean, I don't love _you _like I loved _them -"_

"Okay! Shut up!" Nancy exclaimed, "Now, seeing as I'm a very gullible young woman, I will see if I can get you out on bail," Freddy's face lit up but Nancy gave him a serious look, "But! You'll still have to attend the trial."

Freddy groaned. "Trial? Why? I didn't do anything!" He muttered.

"Yes, but they don't _know_ that, silly," Nancy sighed at him and stood up, clutching her handbag "Honestly Freddy, sometimes I don't know if you're a man or a mouse."

"I'm neither," Freddy grumbled, head in his hands.

Nancy considered this. "Oh, right. Anyway, I've got to run to the store for some morpheine. But I'll be back as soon as I can, I promise," Her eyes twinkled and Freddy saw love in them again, "But Freddy - don't get impatient and do something you'll regret. Remember, I'm always watching you."

Freddy was like, woah, seriously freaked out. "What? How the hell can you watch me in here?" He enquired.

"I had a _secret camera _installed," Nancy cackled after she spoke, then stopped, looking anxious. "Although, don't look for it. Because.. it's not there. I was lying when I said _secret camera _in that strange voice. Lying. Don't look up, Freddy!" She called after him as she left the cell.

Freddy stared after her, then did exactly as she had told him not to, and looked up at the ceiling. Sure enough, a small camera had been installed in the cell. It was watching him even now, surveying his every move.

"Fuck off, will you?" Freddy growled. Then he almost forgot it was there, because he was too busy thinking about Nancy and the others. Oh, when he got out of there, he would gut whoever had murdered Chucky like a fish. It would be painful. Heck, it would even be worse than Debbie's death in Nightmare 4! Oh, yes..

Freddy began plotting, and laughed like the evil madman he was. But he wasn't a man, like he had pointed out to Nancy before. Anyway, he laughed and plotted for a while before he grew bored and drifted off into an uneasy sleep.

x

When Nancy returned to Horror House she was extremely high on morpheine. Forgetting that she had forgotten to go back and visit Freddy again, Nancy walked drunkily into the house and halted in the doorway. "Hey, Tiffany!" She yelled, giggling.

Tiffany looked up at her. "Oh, hey." She said, "So, did you go and see him?"

"Sure, sure.." Nancy said, "We talked about mice and other various things.. and he said he killed Chucky.." She laughed and her eyes rolled up and down, "So, how was your day?" She added happily, stumbling slightly but managing to sit down.

Tiffany was shocked. "_What? _He actually admitted it?"

Nancy looked blank. Then, she burst into song. "_Row, row, row yer' boat, gently down the streeeam, Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily, life is but a -" _She coughed and forgot the words to the rest of the song. "Oh, yeah, he did. Why?" She grunted, closing her eyes for a brief moment before opening them again.

Tiffany said nothing for a moment and then grabbed hold of Nancy's shoulders. "Nancy, you've got to tell me the truth. Did Freddy confess _or not?_" She threw Nancy a serious look, hoping that then the stupid girl would give her some answers. Nancy looked puzzled, then laughed loudly.

"I won't tell you _nothin'!" _She yelled, jumping up, "Hey, it's pretty dark -"

Then, while Nancy Thompson lay unconcious on the floor as she had just seemingly fallen asleep, Tiffany played back what the girl had just told her, and wondered if Nancy was telling the truth, or if it was that damned morpheine talking.

x

Later on, Tiffany, Candyman and Nancy were sitting in the lounge. Nancy had only just been aroused from her unconciousness by Candyman, who had been worried that she was dying. Unfortunately, she was very much alive but couldn't remember anything of what she had done that day.

"God, I must have been loaded," Nancy groaned, "What were you saying, Tiffany?"

Tiffany said nothing. She was trembling, but didn't realise it. Nancy and Candyman were staring at her oddly and she supposed they had reason to. Tiffany hadn't spoken to anyone all day since Nancy had told her what Freddy had admitted to doing..

"Hey, Tiff?"

Tiffany looked up. "What?" She sighed.

Candyman looked worried, "Uh, I was just saying to Nancy that we haven't arranged the funerals for Chucky, Michael and Samara." He said lowly. He looked as if he was ready for Tiffany to start screaming at him, but she didn't.

"I know, I know," She said, "I'm sorry, Candyman. I've just been really busy lately trying to cope with it all.."

Candyman nodded, "Yeah, I know. But I was thinking.. maybe we should bury Samara with Michael or something? I mean, it's what they both would have wanted, right?" He paused and rolled his eyes, "Or what _Samara _would have wanted, anyway."

"So, Chucky just has to lay in some stupid grave all by himself?" Nancy piped up.

Candyman looked over at her and sighed, "Uh, no, Nancy -"

"You know _what?_" Nancy stood up suddenly, causing the chair she had been sitting on to fall to the ground, "What is the deal with you, Candyman? I mean, you just sit there and tell us that we have to throw someone's body into a grave or some shit."

"Um, that's generally what you do when somebody dies, Nancy." Tiffany said sharply, getting sick of her.

Nancy stared at Tiffany in disbelief. "So, you're just taking sides now, right?"

"You know Nance, when you first came here, you were kind of crazy. Now though? Well, you've just completely fallen off the deep end," Candyman chipped in, glaring at her, "Just shut the fuck up, all right?"

Nancy sneered at him. "Oh, really? Well, I can do that," She stormed out of the room, almost tripping up as she did so. Tiffany shook her head at Candyman and the two of them began to discuss what Nancy had said before.

"Really? She said that?" Candyman laughed, "Tiff, you shouldn't believe everything that chick says. She's a fucking lunatic, for christ's sake."

"Well.." Tiffany bit her lip, "I just don't know anymore. Listen to me, you have to help me with the funeral arrangments."

"What? But I thought -"

"Yeah? Well, just listen to me. I want all three of them buried together. I want the service to be short and sweet. I'll dig the graves in the back yard.." When Candyman raised an eyebrow Tiffany scowled, "Well, then you'll help me."

"Okay, but one question. Are you going to let Freddy come?" When Tiffany didn't respond, Candyman went on, "Tiff, he's gonna get out on bail soon. He's got the trial, but what if he goes free? What'll you do when he comes for _you?_"

Tiffany didn't know. Then, something suddenly occured to her, "I thought you didn't believe me when I said I thought Freddy was the killer," She said bluntly, staring blankly at him.

Candyman sighed, "Well, I don't know what to think anymore, Tiffany. But if he gets out, I'll protect you. We all will."

They hugged, and Tiffany squeaked: "Even Nancy?"

Candyman laughed, "Well, she's always been a great friend to you, right? And yeah, she's one crazy chick, but she's still loveable." He smiled and licked his lips. "Alas, I remember when I used to lust after her when she first came here.."

Tiffany stared up at him. "_What?_"

Candyman looked like he'd been struck dumb, "Er, nothing. Anyway.." He pulled her into a hug. Tiffany hugged him back, but thought over all all they had talked about. It would be a hard thing to do indeed, but she had to plan the funeral for her late husband. Besides, she had nothing better to do.

Back in his cell, Freddy sat alone in the darkness. "I'll be out soon," He growled to himself, "And then, when I do get out, there'll be hell to pay."


	15. The Funeral: Part 1

Okay, this is PART 1 of the very last chapter! Thanks everyone for r&r-ing this piece of crap anyways. I might write another sequel to this one in the future. Soo anyway, we're about to find out who the killer is.. ok, whatever. Read on.

x

Very early the next morning, Tiffany and the other remaining residents of Horror Hall rose to begin the funeral preperations. Nancy was in charge of invitations while Candyman was in charge of digging the plots out in the backyard where Chucky, Michael and Samara would be buried. Tiffany, meanwhile, had ordered three coffins on Ebay the other night, and was busy loading Chucky, Michael and Samara into them, with help from Jason.

At around 10:30 Nancy returned from visiting Freddy for the fourth time that morning. The door swung shut behind her, and she glared at Tiffany, who was trying not to look at her. Holding her head high, Nancy stormed off upstairs.

Tiffany sighed and banged her plastic fist down on one of the coffins. "God, this is all going to hell.." She muttered, suddenly feeling sick. "Jason, could you take over for a while? I'm gonna go and help Candyman in the backyard."

Jason grunted and nodded curtly at her. With that, Tiffany left him alone and went outside to talk to Candyman. "Hey!" He called to her as she stepped outside, "I'm almost done. Will this plot be big enough for all three of them?"

Tiffany's eyes dropped to the huge hole in the ground. "Mmhm, that should be fine," She said, her lip trembling. "Jesus Candyman, Nancy isn't even talking to me anymore. I don't get it, we've been such good friends for so long now.." Tears burned in her eyes and threatened to spill down her plastic cheeks, "Hey, I need to tell you something. But you have to promise that you won't tell, all right?"

Candyman let the shovel he had been holding drop to the ground. "Yeah, what is it?" He enquired as they sat down together on the bench.

"Okay, this is gonna sound stupid, but.." Tiffany closed her eyes briefly before opening them, "A long time ago I told Samara something. A _secret. _I need to tell you now as she's gone and I don't have anyone to talk about it with.."

"Okay," Candyman replied casually, waiting.

Tiffany took a deep breath and continued. "A while ago I started having feelings for Freddy. And.. then I kinda' - fell in love with him." She blushed boiling crimson as Candyman's jaw dropped. "Oh, stop looking at me like that, you jackass!" She slapped him hard but he still gawped at her.

"So you think that's why she's pissed at you?" Candyman said in a high-pitched voice, still goggling at her.

"I don't know.." Tiffany said, and she didn't know to be honest. No, Nancy couldn't have found out. Unless.. she had been to visit Freddy four times that day, so what if he'd confessed _his _love to _her _infront of _Nancy?_

Tiffany grinned. She could only hope for that.

"Err, anyway. Don't we have a funeral to plan here? Is it gonna be like we're just chucking the coffins into the whole and saying some words to eachother?" Candyman cut in, feeling pretty uncomfortable.

"Yeah, something like that," Tiffany mumbled, "I have to stand up and say shit about Chucky and the others. You do too, though. We all have to say something."

Candyman groaned. "Why? Why can't we just dump them in there and say 'amen' or something?"

"Because that's not how funerals work, silly!" Tiffany snapped, jumping down from the bench, "Listen, don't tell anyone about - you know.. Especially Nancy. Don't say a _word _to her." She sounded awfully serious so Candyman vowed not to speak to Nancy about it.

A while later the guests began to arrive, and the funeral began.

x

Nancy sat by herself, her arms folded. She pouted. Yeah, she was really angry. Tiffany had forbade her to read out her speech! Well, what a fucking bitch that girl was.. she was a _doll, _Nancy could finish her off whenever she wanted to..

So anyway, the turnout at the funeral was pretty surprising. Rachel Keller and her geeky weirdo son Aidan were there. Just before the ceremony Rachel even came up to Nancy and asked her: "So.. she's really dead? This isn't just some sick joke, is it?"

Nancy turned to her and sighed. "No, it's not a sick joke. Why, who the fuck are you, anyway?" She enquired, not in the mood to be pestered by this strange looking woman who, by the way, _seriously needed _a new hairdo.

"So you watched the tape?" Rachel went on, ignoring this. Nancy stared down and saw that Rachel was clutching a tape in her hands.

Nancy stared closely at the label. "Oh yeah, Freddy and I watched that a few months ago. The plot was rushed and the FX were fucking shit!" She exclaimed, rolling her eyes, "_He _thought it was great, though." She laughed, "Samara actually came out of the TV exactly a week later. Of course, we'd been watching _Star Wars _then, so I was really glad she did it then." She looked up absently, "Hm, good thing I'm already dead, isn't it?"

Rachel was left standing there looking like an idiot whilst Nancy went off to fetch a bottle of brandy. Meanwhile, other guests had begun to arrive. There was Dr. Noah Wyle, Tall Man, Leprechaun, Pinhead.. so many others that Nancy didn't even recognise.

"Hey there, princess," John Saxon said, appearing at Nancy's side.

Nancy shrieked in surprise and relaxed, "Oh. Hey, daddy. I thought you couldn't make it today?"

"Nope, turned out Hell was rather busy today so I got away pretty easily," Sax grinned at her, "So, how's it been? I mean, life living with a bunch of psychotic maniacs?"

"Hm, can't complain," Nancy said conversationally, shrugging her shoulders, "I still can't believe the turnout today.. well I suppose Michael was one of the best slashers in history, but nobody even _liked _Chucky or Samara that much.."

"Hmm, true," Sax looked over at the very dead Morgans, who were crying and being consoled by Rachel Keller who at the same time was still questioning them about a video tape. "Jeez, funerals are always so.. depressing."

"You mean like Mom's?" Nancy smiled, "Yeah, _that _was pretty depressing. But we might aswell just get this over and done with.."

"Hey, Nancy! Get over here!" Candyman yelled at Nancy, who rolled her eyes and went off to join Candyman and Jason.

A few minutes later Tiffany came up to Sax, who was dumbfounded at the sight of her. "Hey there sweetface. So, you're Nancy's father?" She winked at him, "Oh, you don't look a day over _twelve, _mister."

Nancy heard. She saw. She came charging towards Tiffany. "_Tiffany! You bitch! Trying to sweet talk my father!" _She shrieked, bending down to slap her.

Tiffany's eyes widened and her jaw dropped. "_Ooh! Slut! Bitch-slapping meeee!" _She slapped Nancy right back, who lunged for the doll. The two of them rolled around on the grass, kicking and screaming, biting and slapping, whilst everyone came around to watch.

Nancy grabbed Tiffany's hair and managed to throw her off. Tiffany hit a tree, and when she had managed to get back up again, Nancy saw the side of her face was dented.

"Haha! Bitch!" She screeched, pointing and laughing. Other people were pointing and laughing aswell. Tiffany felt the tears spilling down her plastic cheeks. Oh, how she wished that Freddy was here. He would surely dump Nancy if he saw what a bitch she was being to her..

"Hey, what the fuck is goin' on here?"

Nancy turned, and almost fainted. Tiffany craned her neck to see what Nancy was looking at. She almost fainted, too.

There, standing but a few feet away from them, was Freddy.


	16. The Funeral: Part 2

x

"_Freeeeeeedddyyyyyy!"_

Nancy screamed his name and then ran to him, throwing her arms around his neck. "Oh, Freddy! You're back! How the hell did you get out of prison?" She enquired.

Freddy looked positively uncomfortable at this, "Umm, I got out on bail. Uh, Nancy - ?" Nancy understood and removed her arms from around his neck, "Listen, where's that killer? I know he's here someplace.. it's perfect, isn't it? Coming to the funeral.. he'd get a few victims here."

Nancy was shocked. "You think it's a _he? _Why Freddy, you sexist monster!" Freddy glanced at her strangely and she laughed, batting her eyelashes at him, "I'm kidding! Hey, you won't _believe _what that bitch Tiffany just did to me.."

But as Nancy launched into the story of her and Tiffany's little bitch fight, a white van suddenly pulled up in the back yard. Everyone was amazed at this.. it had just appeared out of nowhere. Anyway, a young woman with short brown hair with red streaks came racing towards Freddy and Nancy. She was holding a mic and had a lazy looking cameraman at her side.

"Hello, Freddy Krueger is it? Gail Weathers," The woman said quickly, holding out her hand but removing it from view before Freddy had a chance to shake it. "So, recently out of jail, huh? What are your thoughts and feelings on that?"

"Um, I -"

"Okay Gail. In three, two, one.. action!" The camera man said, and suddenly they were on the air.

"Gail Weathers here at 1238 'Horror Hall' on this fine day, where the funeral for three beloved psychotic killers, Michael Myers, Charles Lee Ray and Samara Morgan is taking place. Earlier today Mr. Freddy Krueger was released from jail on bail. He will be facing the jury next week on trial for the murder of all the killers just mentioned."

Gail smiled at the camera and Nancy noticed how white her teeth were. "Wow, she must floss a lot," She muttered, holding onto Freddy because she was so afraid of this strange woman.

"Uh, excuse me?" Freddy cut in, and Gail wheeled around to look at him, "Um, you're not making much sense. Maybe you could talk _slower, _hm?"

From behind them, Tiffany watched as Freddy began to grow impatient. Hah, soon he would begin hacking the woman to bits. And then maybe afterwards Tiffany would say she loved him, he would confess that he had loved her all along and the two of them would move to Mexico and start over.

"So Mr.Krueger, how does it feel to be back on the outside?" Gail went on, holding the mic up at him.

Freddy suddenly grinned, striking a pose, glad to be TV'S new flavour of the month. "Uh, well Gail, it's great, because I get to go back to killing kids in their sleep. And I also get to return to my girl," He smiled down at Nancy.

"How sweet," Gail said, glancing at the two of them in distaste, "Okay! So, are you looking forward to the trial next week, Mr.Krueger?"

"Hey! I ain't goin' to no trial, bitch! I didn't kill anybody!" Freddy roared, "..Well, nobody _recently. _If you don't believe me, fucking go to hell!" He went on, grabbing the mic and stuffing it down Gail's throat.

Gail appeared to be choking on the mic for a second before the swallowed it whole. "Oh..oh..wow..wow.." She said, and everything she said came out in echoes, "Hey..hey..you'd..you'd..better..better..beable..beable..to..to..pay..pay..for..for..that..that..!" She exclaimed.

Freddy reached out to slash Gail's throat, but she ducked quickly and fell to the ground. Freddy had been about to finish her off when there was a noise from behind them. He stood up and whipped around.

Ghostface was standing opposite him. He held up his hand, and Freddy saw that the cheap fuck was holding a blade.

Freddy turned to Nancy, raising an eyebrow at her. "Let me get this straight. You invited _him _to this fucking thing?" He spat.

Nancy shrank away from him. "He threatened me for an invite, Freddy! What the fuck was I supposed to _do!" _She hissed.

"_Hello Freddy," _Ghostface snickered, "_Or 'Mr.Krueger' if you prefer.." _He stepped towards them and Nancy gave a gasp of surprise and hid behind Freddy. _Jeez, women, _Freddy thought, rolling his eyes as he raised his claw, prepared to fight.

"You fuck," Freddy growled, "Killing Chucky and Michael, and even Samara! Well, bitch. We'll just see if you get out of _this _alive!" He dove forward, slashing at Ghostface with his claw, but the creep had been ready for him. He lunged forwards and managed to stab Freddy in his upper arm.

Freddy positively howled and fell back. Nancy had to help him up again, but then he was ready. He raised his claw again, waving the blades mockingly at Ghostface. "Ooh Ghosty, let's see how you like _this _you bitch!" He yelled, lunging at Ghostface, knocking him to the ground.

"Hey! Hey! Get back up, quick!"

Freddy stood up, feeling alarmed.

"Fuck! Get the fuck up! You'll blow our cover!"

Ghostface managed to stagger to his feet but when Freddy gave him a light prod with the end of one of his blades, old Ghosty took another tumble. Only this time, it became clear that there was more than one culprit behind all of the murderers. When Ghostface fell, out tumbled Chucky and Glen.

"You dumb fuck! I _told _you to keep your goddamn balance!" Chucky roared in Glen's face as they sat together on the grass.

"Sorry, dad," Glen said quietly, looking extremely upset and hanging his head in shame.

Freddy was gobsmacked. "_What? Chucky! _You mean _you _killed Samara and Michael?"

Chucky nodded.

"But - You _died!" _Nancy spluttered, appearing at Freddy's side. "So - how could you - ?"

"Well, long story short: I was kinda' gettin' sick of how nobody round here was killin' anymore. So, I got Glen to _pretend _to kill me so nobody would think _I _killed Myers and Samara!" Chucky explained. He suddenly stopped and looked to Freddy's right.

Tiffany had appeared beside them. She looked livid. "So, Chucky. It was _you _all along, huh?" She hissed, "You bastard! You selfish bastard! You became so desperate to kill that you were willing to kill all your _friends?"_

"Yeah, I guess so," Chucky yawned, "Look Tiff, I'm sorry, all right? It's just, me being a psychopath and a killer and all.. I got kinda' fed up of not killing! And those guys were just sittin' there readin' their playboy magazines and datin' people they used to hate!" He sighed, "I'm sorry. It just became too much."

Freddy didn't know what to say. It was a real stab in the back to find that Chucky was the one behind all this. "So, what part did Glen play in all this? Was he just your trusty sidekick?" He enquired, but his eyes were locked on Chucky and he was desperate to get some killing done for the first time in a long while.

"I let him stand on my shoulders while he killed them," Glen said, and burst into tears.

Tiffany gasped and went to comfort him. "Chucky, how could you use your own son like that? That is _exploitation, _mister!"

"Relax Tiff, it's not like I got _him _to do any killing," Chucky said, sounding quite relaxed himself, "So hey, what is this anyhow? Some kind of family get together?" He looked around, grinning, "Wow, I need to make some fresh kills.."

"No you don't," Tiffany said sharply, knocking the blade right out of his hand, "You're never killing again, you piece of shit! Using our son to help you kill! I - I won't have it!" She cried, bareing her teeth at him.

Chucky suddenly remembered. "Oh yeah.. we're gettin' a divorce babe, so you no longer have the right to tell me what to do!" He growled at her, "You _love _Freddy, don't ya, babe? Well, go on then! Run off to Mexico with him! Just don't come cryin' to me when he dumps you for some hotter brunnette with big fake tits!"

"Hey!" Nancy cried, deeply offended.

Tiffany went red and looked at Nancy and Freddy. "Oooh, bitch! Now I'm gonna _kill _you -" Nancy cried out, but Freddy held her back.

"Uh, okay, Tiffany.." Freddy mumbled, uncomfortable with the whole situation. Then he looked at Chucky and decided to get back to the task at hand. "So, you thought you'd frame me, huh? Aww Chucky, you're just a little baby. It's hard to believe that you even managed to kill the likes of Michael and Samara."

"I'm a _way _better killer than you, _Krueger!_" Chucky snarled, grabbing the blade lying nearby him on the grass and pointing it upwards, "Unlike you, I have some _style. You're _a fake ass motherfucker, that's what you are!"

"How did you even escape from your coffin, Chucky?" Tiffany enquired, eyes narrowed.

Chucky turned to her. "I just acted like a doll for a while, bitch. Then when you all weren't looking I got up and killed! And it was good, oh yeah baby," He laughed manically, "And now, I'm gonna kill _all _of you! Even _you!" _He pointed at Sax, who had been helping himself to a hot dog which he dropped.

"Uh yeah, a puney little doll like you," Nancy laughed.

Chucky scowled. "A'right! That's enough of your goddamn girlfriend, Krueger!" He threw the blade with all the force he could muster at Nancy. It hit her directly in the chest and she keeled over, her eyes wide as she fell to the ground.

_"Nancy!"_

Freddy knelt down beside her, pulling the knife out of her chest. Nancy stared up at him and smiled. "Freddy..Freddy.." She moaned.

"What is it, bitch? I mean - Nancy?" Freddy replied, tears in his eyes.

"Freddy.." Nancy coughed up blood but went on speaking, "Do one thing for me.. Just one last thing.."

"_Anything,_" Freddy said solemly, taking her hand in his.

"Please..kill that bitch Tiffany for me..and take her plastic remains and throw them on the scrap heap.." Nancy wheezed and coughed again, "I love you, Freddy.." She managed, before her heart gave out completely and she lay motionless, sprawled on the ground beside him.

"I - I love you too, Nancy." Freddy sobbed, holding her for a moment before jumping up again. "Bastard! I'm gonna gut you and slice you up, Chucky!" He roared.

Chucky smirked. "Okay. Go ahead!"

Tiffany's eyes fell upon Nancy, who was clearly dead. Then they moved across to Chucky, then to Freddy. She shrugged. Hell, atleast that bitch was finally gone.

"Okay! Okay! Break it up now!" Tiffany yelled, pulling Freddy off of Chucky. "Okay, you guys. Here's the deal: Chucky, you're gonna be on a short leash from now on! And Freddy, I _do _love you, but I know you don't love me." She looked down, blushing, "So I'm sorry about all that shit."

"It's okay, Tiff," Freddy mumbled, "Why didn't you tell me about this before?"

"Because you were with Nancy! You guys were so happy and I didn't want to mess that up," Tiffany suddenly smiled, "Of course, now that she's -"

"- Still here, happy with _him,_" Nancy interrupted, and Tiffany stared at her in horror. "Sorry Tiffany, I've got nine lives, remember? Well, five now.." She said, turning to Freddy and shrugging, "Freddy! I'm sorry I scared you, honey! But I love you."

"I love you too, Nancy. And I'm sorry, Tiffany." Freddy said. Then, he and Nancy embraced, inwhich Tiffany had to turn away and gag.

"So, about that divorce.." Chucky grunted, "Tiff, babe, I love ya! I always have, and you look _great _today by the way," He remarked, "Just forget what I said. And I promise that I'll try to cut back on killing.. for your sake."

"Oh, Chucky! That's great!" Tiffany said, "And maybe one day I'll fall back in love with you again. But for now, I think you're a jackass." She smiled at him and turned to Nancy. "Nancy, I'm sorry about our.. fight, before. I shouldn't have flirted with your father."

"Well, he's rich and single, so I guess I'll give you permission now," Nancy said casually, "And I'm sorry too, by the way."

Tiffany looked over at Sax, "_Really?_" She said dreamily, licking her lips.

"Uh, _hello!" _Chucky said loudly, and Tiffany scowled at him before going over to Glen.

"Well, I guess the funerals off now.." Nancy said to Freddy.

"Yeah, probably," Samara said from behind them, and Freddy and Nancy turned to find Michael and Samara standing behind them. "Judging by your shocked expressions I can probably guess what you're thinking. Okay, so we're already dead. Means we can come back to life. There, does that make it better?"

"Sam! It's great that you're back!" Nancy said, hugging her, "But how come you didn't just come back after you died?"

Samara shrugged. "Well, we did come out at night to.. talk. But we waited a while before we actually came back. So, here we are.." She smiled at them, "And I'm sorry I thought you were the killer, Freddy."

"Ah, it's okay," Freddy said, and sniggered, "Looks like Tiffany wasn't kidding when she said she was gonna keep Chucky on a short leash from now on."

The group turned and sure enough, Tiffany had fashioned a leash for Chucky and had tied it around his neck. They all laughed at this. It was really funny, see. Hmm.

"So..so..Mr..Mr..Charles..Charles..Lee..Lee..Ray..Ray, How..how..does..does..it..it..feel..feel..to..to.." Gail started, but Chucky laughed manically at her before she could finish.

"Woah, did this bitch swallow a microphone or somethin'?" He enquired, laughing.

"You..you..could..could..say..say..that..that.." Gail muttered.

The funeral was called off and everything was just fine and dandy. Samara haunted Rachel and Aidan at the party, and was reunited with her parents -tear-. Also, Michael and Lori had a great time. Other people had a great time too, can't be bothered mentioning them..

Well, as there seems to be nothing more to say, I'll just sum it up: Freddy and Nancy ended up getting engaged and moved to 1428 Elm Street which is basically next door to where they were currently living. The others stayed behind and Tiffany and Chucky finally fell in love again.. blah blah blah.

But, it won't stop there. So, in the words of Samara:

_"It won't stop."_

_x_

If you thought this was shit, who cares? I wrote this completely out of boredom. Strangely at the beginning it is nothing more than a plotless yet humourous piece of work. Then, as time went on, I decided to form a plot and I did. Sooo, if you hated it, Idk much because I loved writing it.

Those who enjoyed it, thanks a lot! I love you lots xo

So I will probably write a sequel. But for now, that's the end of this one.


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